My daughter, Eloise, was tasked in school to write about something she disliked, that could go into Room 101. Like the comedy panel show that Frank Skinner presents. Panellists nominate something they hate, describe why they hate it, the “winning” topic is consigned to the legendary Room 101 to fester for all time.
Eloise chose “bugs”. She wrote such a passionate article that I though I’d share it here. Whether you agree with her or not, it’s a sincere piece with some real emotion!
Room 101: Bugs – by Eloise Jones
Bugs. Disgusting, right? Tiny and fast, they could be anywhere at anytime – hiding underneath your bed covers, in your favourite mug of hot chocolate… Whatever your least–favourite bugs are, I’m sure I hate all of them.
Starting off with places that bugs are free to roam. Such as Pili Palas. Butterflies flying everywhere, landing on your head – it’s a complete nightmare! 9/10 people dislike things that fly, so imagine someone walking into the butterfly house and going completely crazy! Also, around 95% of people hate it when flies come into the house and start flying around, so much that they kill them with a book! Bugs are just gross, ghastly and gory.
Personally, I have had several traumatising experiences that have altered my brain in some way. My first one is when I was younger, I went to a museum with my class. There was a room about bugs that scared me because they had these ginormous, ugly and terrifying models of bugs. That left me scarred for life. Another one is not too long ago, I was on holiday in Greece and there were loads of icky grasshopper – type creatures jumping everywhere. Whenever I talk about that holiday and I get to the topic of those nasty little beasts I refer to them as “Killer bugs”.
Just think of the peaceful and free life we’d have if we had no bugs. A summer without bugs even – jumping into pools and eating ice cream without all the fuss of having bug spray on. Sure, we have to wear sun cream still – (which is also annoying) – but there won’t be intrusive wasps attacking your cheese sandwich on a peaceful summer day. A family dinner without the odd wasp coming over and making the entire party jump up and run around. The perfect summer.
Surely everyone agrees that bugs are extremely annoying. When you’re enjoying a run in the garden with summer clothes on, kicking the football across the garden and then suddenly a wasp arrives, stings you and ruins the fun. It’s also annoying when a bug bites you and it gets sore and itchy and it really hurts. And if the worse comes to worst – There could be a bug invasion and bugs could come to fame! (Which is highly unlikely)
Honestly, who does like bugs? They’re not cute, they’re not that intelligent, and sure, wiping flies out will wipe out all spiders as well and will eventually corrupt the entire world, but at least I won’t have to put up with midges trying to eat me and my family alive whenever we go on holiday.