Tag Archives: Santa

Christmas Tat 2019

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And now for a visual feast of festive tat.  A collection of the odd and the bizarre, rendered in cheap plastic (or glass if you’re lucky).

You may have noticed that certain stores sell “wacky” Christmas baubles, gloriously garish and ridiculously random.  Not the traditional seasonal balls here – we’ve wandered into distinctly abstract territory.

Whilst the groovy shops sell the strange tree trinkets for a tenner, other, less glamorous emporiums are knocking them out for a couple of quid.  And bless ’em, these cheapo ones are usually even more ugly and weird.

Which is where I come in.  As a genuine aficionado of the kitsch Christmas, I have collected some of these decorations from various sources.  They are proudly displayed on our Christmas tree, and here I present them to you for your entertainment.

Enjoy these bad taste baubles, dear reader, and be inspired by the wondrous world of tat.

In the photos below you will see:

  • A taco
  • A guitar
  • A cupcake
  • Santa with a surfboard
  • A pizza slice
  • Some beer
  • Peppers and an ice cream
  • Another taco
  • A VW Beetle
  • A crown and a strawberry
  • A VW camper van with a Christmas tree
  • A crocodile in a UFO (my personal favourite)

 

I want a tattoo of the crocodile in a UFO – spectacular.

Hopefully you’ve enjoyed that trip into the low quality and down right strange.

I would like to wish all my readers a very Merry Christmas!  Thank you for reading Platinum Al’s Virtual Hot Tub, your support is always appreciated.

Christmas Playlist

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Nothing gets me in the festive spirit like a few classic Christmas songs, or indeed, a bit of seasonal strangeness – as in this playlist.  A bit of alcohol helps too, mind.

I’ve already covered my Top Ten Christmas songs, and this playlist isn’t just run down of all the usual Crimbo staples.  This list is more complicated, idiosyncratic, and pointless than that.

Within my music collection are several Christmas songs, of varying fame, often collected together on themed compilations.

This list pulls together the songs that aren’t on those compilations, as well as some of the standards that do, but for one reason or another have found themselves bundled in with this bunch of misfits.

For example, there are several tunes that are always part of any respectable Christmas collection, but can also be found bunged onto Greatest Hits albums.  Songs like the wonderful Slade song “Merry Xmas Everybody”: it’s on all the comps, but I selected my copy from the Slade Best Of to group together with similar songs.  Shaky, The Pogues and John Lennon are other examples of this type.

Then there are the album Crimbo album tracks that are hidden away on band’s regular studio albums, such as the Ramones track (see also: AC/DC, Joan Jett).  They’re not going to crop up on a Now Christmas comp, so I added them here.

Plus, there are various songs from singles (the Darkness track) and a few of dubious seasonal pedigree…

Here’s my Christmas Odds and Sods playlist.  Enjoy!

  1. Slade – “Merry Xmas Everybody”
  2. Shakin’ Stevens – “Merry Christmas Everyone”
  3. The Pogues (with Kirsty MacColl – “Fairytale of New York”
  4. John Lennon – “Happy Christmas (War is Over)”
  5. Queen – “Thank God it’s Christmas”
  6. Ramones – “Merry Christmas (I Don’t Want to Fight Tonight)”
  7. AC/DC – “Mistress for Christmas”
  8. The Beatles – “Christmas Time (Is Here Again)
  9. The Darkness – “Christmas Time (Don’t Let the Bells End)
  10. Tom Jones and Cerys Matthews – “Baby It’s Cold Outside”
  11. Joan Jett & The Blackhearts – “Little Drummer Boy”
  12. Boney M – “Mary’s Boy Child”
  13. Christopher Lee – “Silent Night”
  14. Bad News – “Cashing in on Christmas”
  15. Roy Orbison – “Pretty Paper”
  16. The Sensational Alex Harvey Band – “There’s No Light on the Christmas Tree Mama They’re Burning Big Louie Tonight”
  17. The Damned – “There Ain’t No Sanity Clause”
  18. Emmy the Great & Tim Wheeler – “Home for the Holidays”
  19. Monster Magnet – “Dead Christmas”
  20. UK Subs – “Hey Santa”
  21. Black Stone Cherry – “Santa Claus is Back in Town”
  22. Christopher Lee – “Little Drummer Boy”
  23. Queen – “A Winter’s Tale”

Merry Christmas all!

Christmas Tat 2014

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The tree is up, the lights are on and the smell of mulled wine wafts through from the kitchen.  Yes, it’s that time of year again, the most tatty time of the year – Christmas!

No offence meant by that comment, kids – I love Christmas.  And I do take immense joy from the gaudy glitter and paraphernalia that we readily decorate our homes with.  No other time of year sees as much tacky nonsense around the house, and I think it’s great.

Here are a couple of items that have been picked up to add to our collection of Yuletide tat.

Santa

First up, a small ceramic light up Santa.  I picked this up from a local pound shop (my new favourite place!) for just £1.  Unbelievable value.  A flick of the switch underneath sets off the multi coloured lights within.  He’s a jolly little fellow and no mistake, a great little item.

xmas2

Next we have a Nativity scene, which I bought from B&M for £3.99.  Now again, I’ll reiterate that no offence is meant by this piece being in the “tat” section.  I happen to think this is a really nice festive decoration.  It was only cheap, which is reflected in the lacklustre paint job.  But if displayed well this scene looks great.

Hope you like these Crimbo decorations.  Have a great Christmas, and thanks for reading Platinum Al’s Virtual Hot Tub.

Stay tuned for more cool stuff in the New Year!

More Christmas Tat

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It’s Christmas Eve!  And here’s my personal Christmas present to you, loyal readers of the Virtual Hot Tub.  Yes, it’s more pictures of tacky Christmas decorations, this time from my home collection.  As time is now running out till the big day, I’ve combined several tat items into this one post, as a special seasonal treat just for you.

Father Christmas Ornament

No idea where this one came from – I think I rescued from somewhere I worked.  Quite a nice, detailed piece actually.  He’s pretty big.  Like a Christmassy garden gnome, but indoors. IMG_2711

Mini Light-up Santa Head

One pound from Poundstretcher in Mold.  He’s supposed to light up, but it doesn’t work.  Still pretty neat though. IMG_2714

Dancing Santa

This character once belonged to my Gran, if I remember correctly.  He’s been around for a long time, probably early 1980’s.  He looks a little evil – part dancing Santa, part mischievous elf.  Nice stick on beard. IMG_2719

Thanks to everyone for reading Platinum Al’s Virtual Hot Tub.  Merry Christmas to you all!

Christmas Tat

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Light-up Father Christmas

You can have a nice, colour co-ordinated Christmas tree with matching lights, baubles and tinsel.  You can can have tasteful decorations adorning your lovely home in minimalist style.  Or you can go bonkers and cover the place with tat!

Personally, I like a bit of tat at Christmas.  Probably no surprise there.  Here, for your visual amazement, is one of the coolest, yet cheap, Crimbo ornaments ever.  It was owned by my friend Nicky, and sat on her desk in work.  It’s a wax Father Christmas candle, which also has a light up feature inside.

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Light-up Father Christmas, centre. Desk top tree and Oogey-Boogey along for the ride.

Apparently this was really cheap (£1?), and came from a Christmas bargain shop in Wrexham.  I think it’s awesome.  I would love to own one, for two reasons.  Firstly, it’s quite a well crafted likeness and fairly detailed.  Secondly, it’s tacky as hell.  A candle that lights up from the inside as well?  Beyond pointless.

Light up Santa is a really nice bit of tat, though now he’s apparently been lost in an office move.  If you ever see one of these on your travels, readers, please buy a couple.  One for yourself, and one for me.  I promise I’ll pay you back.

More Christmas tat very soon…