The Viking Halloween Horror Fest

Well Halloween 2018 is over, sadly.  But there are a few other movies I’ve watched in October as part of my Horror Fest, so here’s a quick overview of them.  I promise to keep this short and sweet…

The Brides of Fu Manchu (1966)

Is this even a horror movie?  I consulted the oracle of all things frightful, my old Horror Top Trumps, and YES – Fu Manchu is in there.  If he’s in that card pack then this counts as horror, as far as I’m concerned. 

Having said that, The Brides of Fu Manchu is more Indiana Jones style adventure than scary movie, despite some gruesome elements.

Fu Manchu is played by Christopher Lee (in make-up, the sort of Hollywood white washing that would quite rightly cause uproar nowadays).  The evil criminal mastermind is kidnapping the daughters of prominent scientists, to bribe them into helping him create a death ray.  It’s up to Scotland Yard’s Nayland Smith (Douglas Wilmer) to stop him.

The Brides of Fu Manchu is terribly dated.  But if we can all agree to be adults and appreciate that this film was made in another age, reflecting views of an even older age, then it’s quite a rip-roaring yarn.  Take it with a pinch of salt and watch it with a wary eye.

7/10

The Viking Queen (1967)

It’s Hammer, but it’s not really horror!  The Viking Queen is (very) loosely based on the story of Boudica in Roman Britain. 

Here we have the tale of British Queen Salina (played by Carita) and nice Roman leader Justinian (Don Murray) who plan on creating a fair land for all.  And they fall in love.  Predictably, there are grumps on both Briton and Roman sides that conspire to make a right old mess of things for the romantic couple.

On first viewing, I found the historical inaccuracies too much to swallow.  Further viewings have allowed my expectations to be lowered and I’ve begun to enjoy it more.  Not for the history buffs, but The Viking Queen is an enjoyable tale (with some nasty gory bits to remind us it is Hammer, after all).

7/10

Arachnophobia (1990)

It’s Jaws with Spiders!  New doctor in town Jeff Daniels is an arachnophobe, who just happens to move his family to a new town that’s about to become deadly spider central. 

I saw this film in the cinema and don’t think I’ve ever watched it again since.  So I was surprised that it was actually still quite good fun, with the sort of scares that force the viewer to move away from any possible spider hiding places in the living room.

Good fun and quite gruesome in places, it’s too scary for young children (as I found out), although completely obvious plot-wise.  Disconnect brain and enjoy.

8/10

Monsters vs. Aliens (2009)

Much more suitable for your younger monsters, this animated feature from Dreamworks manages to entertain and pay homage to classic B-movie monsters from the past. 

Susan Murphy (voiced by Reese Witherspoon) is hit by a meteorite that mutates her into a giant, Attack of the 50 Foot Woman character.  She’s whisked off to a top secret military installation and holed up with some other monstrous types.  Eventually the creatures are brought out of confinement to defend earth from an alien invasion.

Monsters vs. Aliens features a great voice cast including Hugh Laurie (a mad scientist/The Fly-like Dr Cockroach), Seth Rogen (as The Blob-like B.O.B.), Will Arnett (as the Missing Link, a Creature from the Black Lagoon specimen) and Kiefer Sutherland as the General in charge.  Rogen in particular is hilarious.

Lots of fun, great animation and a nice message if that’s your thing.  Monster vs. Aliens is a winner.

8/10

Horror Top Trumps

Dracula vs Fu Manchu!  The Creature from the Black Lagoon vs Godzilla!  The Wolfman vs Man Eating Plant!  Just a few of the fun confrontations that can occur with this classic Horror Top Trumps game!

Top Trumps is a card game, where the statistics of one card are pitted against another.  Surely you’ve played it?  The most usual sets were cars, aeroplanes or football teams.  There were occasionally sets that were a little more unusual, such as these Horror themed cards.

There were two Horror packs to collect.  Each card featured a different monster and broke down their stats to Physical Strength, Fear Factor, Killing Power and Horror Rating.  All the legendary monsters were present, plus a few others that were more obscure.  So in addition to the characters mentioned above, there were also the Mummy, Frankenstein’s monster, King Kong, the Thing and more. P_20140505_185808

As a monster obsessed kid, it was a great way to feed my obsessive thirst for knowledge.  I didn’t just play these cards repeatedly, I also studied each one.  For the majority of monsters, I had no idea what film there were from.  Over the years, and thanks to some old horror books I’ve collected, I’ve recognised the characters from published film stills.

Interestingly, though, the character names are quite random.  For example, the card named “Phantom of the Opera” is actually a picture of Dr Phibes.  Similarly, “The Freak” is actually the Reptile from the Hammer movie of the same name.

The artwork on the cards was often quite gruesome also.  There was a rumour I heard for many years that the Horror cards were banned in the early 80’s due to the graphic images.  I doubt that was the case, though illustrations for cards such as The Fiend and Venusian Death Cell were quite bloody.

I’m lucky enough to have collected both Horror Top Trump packs when I was a kid, and I’ve still got them.  They’re not mint condition, and I only have the title card for the second pack.  Never the less, they’re still played with, and bring a gory thrill…