Horror Top Trumps

Dracula vs Fu Manchu!  The Creature from the Black Lagoon vs Godzilla!  The Wolfman vs Man Eating Plant!  Just a few of the fun confrontations that can occur with this classic Horror Top Trumps game!

Top Trumps is a card game, where the statistics of one card are pitted against another.  Surely you’ve played it?  The most usual sets were cars, aeroplanes or football teams.  There were occasionally sets that were a little more unusual, such as these Horror themed cards.

There were two Horror packs to collect.  Each card featured a different monster and broke down their stats to Physical Strength, Fear Factor, Killing Power and Horror Rating.  All the legendary monsters were present, plus a few others that were more obscure.  So in addition to the characters mentioned above, there were also the Mummy, Frankenstein’s monster, King Kong, the Thing and more. P_20140505_185808

As a monster obsessed kid, it was a great way to feed my obsessive thirst for knowledge.  I didn’t just play these cards repeatedly, I also studied each one.  For the majority of monsters, I had no idea what film there were from.  Over the years, and thanks to some old horror books I’ve collected, I’ve recognised the characters from published film stills.

Interestingly, though, the character names are quite random.  For example, the card named “Phantom of the Opera” is actually a picture of Dr Phibes.  Similarly, “The Freak” is actually the Reptile from the Hammer movie of the same name.

The artwork on the cards was often quite gruesome also.  There was a rumour I heard for many years that the Horror cards were banned in the early 80’s due to the graphic images.  I doubt that was the case, though illustrations for cards such as The Fiend and Venusian Death Cell were quite bloody.

I’m lucky enough to have collected both Horror Top Trump packs when I was a kid, and I’ve still got them.  They’re not mint condition, and I only have the title card for the second pack.  Never the less, they’re still played with, and bring a gory thrill…

Hallowe’en Horror Fest of Wolves

Paranormal Xperience (2011)

A group of students travel to a deserted town to investigate the apparent paranormal activity witnessed there.  The story goes that the town doctor went mad, tortured and killed several inhabitants.  As the group conduct their exploration, the supernatural begins to manifest itself – but who is the focus?

This Spanish (subtitled) film offers a cliched cast of characters, and can’t decide if it wants to be a dramatised version of Most Haunted or Saw.  At first it’s a fairly clumsy mutation of the two, but stay with it and the actual story is worth experiencing.

Not essential viewing, but the twist is interesting (I didn’t see it coming, anyway).

7/10

The Company of Wolves (1984)

“Never stray from the path, never eat a windfall apple and never trust a man whose eyebrows meet in the middle.”

Neil Jordan’s dreamlike film is often explained as an updating of the Little Red Riding Hood tale.  But there’s so much more to it than that.  coofwolves

Rosaleen (Sarah Patterson) hears tales of strange men with eyebrows that meet in the middle from her grandmother (Angela Lansbury).  There are several elements of werewolf folklore, wrapped up in dreams and myths that provide a warning to young maidens – illustrating how people in years gone by were wary of the forest at night, the full moon and the howling wolves.

Although the effects are dated somewhat, the transformations from man into wolf are quite ingenious.  However this isn’t really a horror movie, it ‘s a film heavy with symbolism that explores the loss of innocence and the onset of sexual maturity.  There’s plenty to enjoy with the rich, surreal vision we are presented with, but far more to think about.

Great cameo by Terence Stamp, too.

8/10

Hallowe’en Horror Fest AD 1972

Dracula AD 1972 (1972)

1872: Count Dracula is locked in mortal combat with arch enemy, Lawrence Van Helsing.  The Count (Christopher Lee) is destroyed, though Van Helsing (Peter Cushing) also perishes from his wounds.  A disciple of the vampire collects some of the ashes, and Dracula’s ring; burying them at the site of a church.

1972: A group of young London groovers are persuaded to take part in a satanic mass “for kicks”.  Amongst the group is Jessica Van Helsing (Stephanie Beacham), grand daughter of Lorrimer Van Helsing (Cushing again) and descendent of the original vampire slayer.  Little do they know that one member of the group, Johnny Alucard (Christopher Neame), is himself a disciple of Dracula – and intends to resurrect the Count.  dracula_ad_1972_poster_06

Following a bloody ritual in a deconsecrated church, Dracula (Lee) is revived, and he begins to plan his revenge against the House of Van Helsing…

With this film Hammer attempted to drag their Gothic horror films into the modern era.  So in Dracula AD 1972, we’re presented with a Dracula in (then) modern day swinging London, complete with cars, rock’n’roll bands and hip young kids out for a good time.  It’s for this reason that the film is most often derided as silly, if not damn near sacrilegious.

The young hippies are given a look and slang that most surely must have been out of place by 1972.  Viewed now, the dialogue is sometimes hilarious.

Despite the harsh opinions held by many about Dracula AD 1972, I love it.  As a confirmed fan of all things from the seventies, I find it outrageously good fun to see Dracula in this anachronistic setting.  What we lose with the lack of traditional Gothic period setting, we gain in a campy, retro London with funky Blaxploitation style music and cool sets.Yes, the kids’ dialogue is ridiculous, but it’s also great fun if the audience just accepts it.

Draculaad1972

My VHS and DVD copies

As a glimpse of an imaginary 1970’s London, I find this film really enjoyable.  Part Hammer and part The Sweeney, if you will.  That it was an inspiration for Tim Burton on Dark Shadows is well documented, and hopefully means that Dracula AD 1972 is finally getting some recognition for it’s attempt to inject new blood (haha!) into the Count.

There are some bloody moments, but nothing too shocking for a modern audience.  What we do get is a great performance by Peter Cushing, who really embodies his role as occult expert with authority.  Lee, too, is imposing and majestic as Dracula, truly menacing and physically powerful.  It would’ve been great though to see the Count stalking around London for victims at night more, certainly a missed opportunity.

The youngsters give it a good go despite the atrocious (or funny) lines – Beacham and Neame are both great.  Plus Michael Coles as the Inspector gives us a character that is actually believable.

My personal favourite element of this film though is the wonderful, bewitching Caroline Munro.  Here Ms Munro appears in one of her most iconic roles as Laura Bellows, and she has never looked lovelier.  Good performance too, though it would’ve been great to see Caroline resurrected as a Bride of Dracula.

So despite some utter ridiculousness and a couple of wasted opportunities, I can only recommend Dracula AD 1972 as not only one of my favourite Hammer films, but one of my favourite films ever.  Cool soundtrack, too.

“Dig the music, kids!”

10/10 for me

9/10 for everyone else

Dark Shadows Playlist

Dark Shadows Soundtrack – Playlist

Recently I posted my Hallowe’en Horror Fest mini-review of the film Dark Shadows.  It’s a great film from Tim Burton, in my opinion.  One of the best things about that movie is the soundtrack.

The film is set in 1972, so the soundtrack consists of songs from that era.  Contrasting heavy rock, pop and a bit of soul, there are a few cuts that fit the Gothic mood; and others that are just cool.

I put together this playlist – utilising songs from my collection – meaning I didn’t need to buy the soundtrack album…

1. The Moody Blues – “Nights in White Satin”

This classic soundtracks the opening of Dark Shadows, chronicling Victoria’s journey to Collinwood Manor.  Sets up a moody(!) atmosphere.

2. Iggy Pop & The Stooges – “I’m Sick Of You”

I love it when Iggy gets some respect.  Cool tune, as heard in Carolyn’s room.

3. Donovan – “Season of the Witch”

Carolyn Stoddard plays this on vinyl.  Wish I had this on wax.  A Hallowe’en necessity.

4. Deep Purple – “Highway Star”

I can’t remember where this song appears in the movie.  It’s in there though, apparently.  One of the must-have Deep Purple tracks, find it on “Machine Head”.  Or any “Best of”, for that matter.

5. Curtis Mayfield – “Superfly”

Barnabas takes a walk through Collinsport, soundtracked with this mighty slab of Mayfield funk.  Not an obvious vampire tune, but so right for the era.

6. The Carpenters – “Top of the World”

“Reveal yourself, tiny songstress!”

7. Elton John – “Crocodile Rock”

Off to the pub we go, we might bump into Christopher Lee…

8. Black Sabbath – “Paranoid”

It’s the early 70’s.  It’s a dark film.  It needs, no – demands – Sabbath.  Timeless genius from the originators of all that is dark and heavy.  On “Paranoid”, of course.

9. Barry White – “You’re the First, the Last, My Everything”

The Love Machine’s tune is an apt choice for the scene it appears in.  What a song!

10. T.Rex – “Get It On”

So evocative of the time, a welcome airing for this track in the movie.

11. Alice Cooper – “No More Mr Nice Guy”

12. Alice Cooper – “The Ballad of Dwight Fry”

A special mention here for Alice Cooper, who has a cameo role as himself in 1972.  Two classic Coop songs are on this soundtrack.  “The Ballad of Dwight Fry” is possibly my favourite song ever from Alice, so it was great to hear it in the movie.

There you go, twelve songs and 54 minutes of music.  If Tim Burton chose these songs, he has great taste.  Except for that awful Killers song on the end credits.

I guess I’m a bit obsessed with this this film…

You can read my review here.

Hallowe’en Horror Fest of the Dead

Shaun of the Dead (2004)

Shaun (Simon Pegg) decides to get his life on track in the middle of a zombie apocalypse.  Together with best mate Ed (Nick Frost) and group of fellow survivors including his mum, step dad and (ex?) girlfriend, they group together to avoid the undead hordes.  In a pub. Shaun-of-the-dead

This black comedy from Director Edgar Wright and Pegg is very fine indeed.  There are some very funny moments and lots of detail, giving the film a depth and quality that can be enjoyed repeatedly.  Dark it my be, but there’s still plenty of humour and some poignancy too.

A homage to old zombie movies more than a spoof, there’s lots to get your (rotting) teeth into here.  It’s nice to see a zombie movie from a British perspective, where we get a cricket bat as the main defensive weapon.

If you’ve not seen Shaun of the Dead, check it out soon.

Fun fact: I first saw this film when I was getting a tattoo done.  Ouch!

8/10

Evil Hallowe’en Horror Fest

The Evil Dead (1981)

This is one of those Video Nasties then, is it?  Banned in the early 80’s for being so horrific it could warp the mind…

The Evil Dead is the first film of Sam Raimi, and it was fairly infamous many years ago.  So much so that I was very wary when watching it the first time. evildead

Five friends visit a remote cabin in the woods.  There, they discover an ancient Book of the Dead and taped recordings of readings from it.  The recordings are played, awakening evil demons that trap the group and pick them off one by one.  There’s no escape – even the forest itself seems alive…

This film is somewhat dated now, the low budget not helping disguise the fairly unconvincing effects.  The story too is fairly basic, performances are basic too – except for Bruce Campbell who actually does a good job as Ash.  No surprises that The Evil Dead was a first time picture, then.

Raimi manages to create a great atmosphere, though.  Even after all these years, there are some extremely creepy moments, and some genuine shocks that will make you shit your shoes off.  Whereas the gore deflates the picture, the isolation and hopelessness are convincing.  Not my favourite ever film, but certainly a movie that demands to be seen.

8/10

Hallowe’en Horror Fest Shadows

Dark Shadows (2012)

Tim Burton and – who else? – Johnny Depp bring us Dark Shadows, based on the cult late ’60’s TV show of the same name.  It’s a mix of horror, comedy and drama that is happy to lurk in Gothic darkness, but also offers a campy humour. dark

Barnabas Collins (Depp), heir to the wealthy Collins clan fortune, makes the mistake of spurning the love of Angelique (Eva Green).  Angelique happens to be a witch who curses Barnabas to become a vampire.  After being imprisoned for 200 years, Collins is awoken and finds himself in the year 1972.  A man – or vampire – considerably out of his time, Barnabas returns to the family home with the intention of restoring the Collins family to both wealth and harmony.  Aided by matriarch Elizabeth (Michelle Pfeiffer), Barnabas faces Angelique once more; whilst also attempting to help his family and win the love of his life.

Does that sound like fun to you?  It did to me.  Which is why I’m surprised that some people didn’t dig this retro gem.  The mixing of genres may have confused some audiences, but to me Dark Shadows is a delightfully ghoulish confection in the spirit of the Addams Family and The Munsters.

I enjoyed the comedy elements, and there’s enough blood to tick the horror box.  Most of all though, I love the 1970’s setting – obviously inspired (again) by Hammer, there are cool cars and an exceptional soundtrack.  Alice Cooper even has a cameo as himself, for goodness sake – playing two classic Coop tracks!

Great cast, cool atmosphere – it all adds up to a winner in my book.

9/10

Attack of Hallowe’en Horror Fest

Halloween (1978)

This film is perfect for Hallowe’en Horror Fest!  I can’t believe I’ve not reviewed it already.  Here we have the original Halloween from Director John Carpenter, and by golly it’s a beauty.

Michael Myers has been locked up in an institution since the Hallowe’en night when, as young boy, he murdered his sister.  Now Michael has escaped, and returned to his home town to wreak bloody murder on the local teens.  Dr Loomis (Donald Pleasence)  is in pursuit of the deranged killer, but will he be able to stop Myers before Laurie Strode (Jamie Lee Curtis) is his next victim? Halloween_cover

I’m not really a fan of slasher films, but here we have a film that bucks the trend.  Halloween is tense as hell – Carpenter manages to startle the audience time and again.  The viewer is constantly on edge waiting for the next shock.  This film created many of the cliches we are now familiar with in the slasher genre – so it’s to the credit of the Director that the frights still work.  The leads deliver believable performances, too – making this a classic standing head and shoulders over the imitators.

Carpenter also provides the spooky soundtrack, music which can give you a chill even without the visuals!

Recommended.

10/10

Hallowe’en Horror Fest of Blood

Theatre of Blood (1973)

Vincent Price plays Edward Lionheart, Shakespearean actor presumed dead – now returned to seek revenge on the theatre critics who mocked him.  One by one, the tormentors are killed in gruesome ways based on the bard’s work.  Twisted by Obsession, Lionheart creates elaborate methods to slay the critics in the pursuit of an award he felt was rightly his.  theatre-of-blood-poster

This film features a great performance by Price, not to mention a superb cast of British actors not afraid to embrace the camp yet grisly feel of it all.  We see Arthur Lowe, Michael Hordern, Diana Rigg, Ian Hendry, Jack Hawkins and more.  Oh, and the impossibly pretty Madeline Smith gets some screen time too.

The plot is not the most original of ideas – it’s very similar to The Abominable Dr Phibes (also starring Price).  However, several of the murders are actually quite ghastly – as well as bizarre – and the actors’ performances keep the pace rolling along.  There are surprises and chills aplenty, making Theatre of Blood a film I heartily recommend.

8/10

The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975)

Well it’s basically inspired by old B-movies and horror/sci-fi flicks, so The Rocky Horror Picture Show is in this years Hallowe’en Horror Fest!

I’m not a huge fan though, sorry.  Mrs Platinum Al loves this old nonsense though, and made me promise not to write a bad review.  So to ensure I don’t end up like Eddy, I’ll list the things I enjoyed about this film and not mention the negatives.

  • It’s a musical, but has nothing to do with that Lloyd-Webber tit.
  • A couple of the songs are actually quite good – Science Fiction Double Feature is a great tune with cool lyrics in tribute to some classic films.
  • Charles Gray is MAGNIFICENT.
  • Susan Sarandon has a great rack.
  • Magenta would also get a portion (nice French maid outfit).

It’s actually quite good, campy fun for the most part, though I lost interest for the last twenty minutes.  I won’t be dressing up in stockings and suspenders for a late night showing of The Rocky Horror Picture Show any time soon.

4/10

The Return of Hallowe’en Horror Fest

Another October, another Hallowe’en Horror Fest!  As per last year, the Virtual Hot Tub will become a horror themed heaven – or hell – right on through to Hallowe’en.

Here’s this years first horror film mini review…

Pet Sematary (1989)

A family move to a new house, by a busy road, which is also near to the Pet Sematary of the title.  It is here that the local kids bury their beloved, sadly departed pets.  Cursed ground nearby, however, can revive the dead; though the dead come back not as they once were…  Inevitably the busy road takes it’s toll, and the struggle with grief leads to unnatural choices. Pet_sematary_poster

I had seen this adaptation of the Stephen King novel many years ago.  First time around I wasn’t massively impressed, but the film did entertain.  Watching Pet Sematary again after two decades, I was far more enthralled.  I now found some of the tale quite uncomfortable, as a parent.  Though that’s where King excels, taking our everyday fears and exploiting them, creating something quite unnerving.  This movie version manages to retain that dread and convey it well to the audience.

Pet Sematary is slightly dated, and the course of events slightly obvious, but there’s enough chilling imagery to make this film worth watching.

Plus this film picks up bonus points for two things:

  1. It features the late, great Fred Gwynne in a non-Herman Munster role
  2. It also features two Ramones songs (“Sheena is a Punk Rocker” and the title track) in a rare, early example of that fine band invading popular culture.  King is, of course, a big fan.

8/10