Author Archives: platinumal

The Legend of Halloween Horror Fest 2019

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The Legend of Boggy Creek (1972)

Prepare yourself, loyal reader – for one of the scariest, most horrifying films ever made.  A movie that can incite such fear that you will never stay in a log cabin – or trailer home – ever again.  What is this master piece of horror, you ask?  Why, it’s the classic known as The Legend of Boggy Creek!

Filmed in a semi-documentary style, The Legend of Boggy Creek investigates the strange case of a sasquatch type creature in Fouke, Arkansas.  Some local residents actually appear, recounting some of the creepy first hand experiences that they’ve had or heard about the Fouke Monster.

Contrasting visuals of the idyllic southern swampland with the threat of the unknown, waiting in the secluded creek – creates an unusual and gripping story.  Watching it, I felt the small town atmosphere and could imagine the loneliness of the locals – threatened by this mysterious creature.

I first saw The Legend of Boggy Creek when I was around nine years old, during a season of BBC2 “monster movies” that also featured King Kong and Mighty Joe Young.  Such was my fear that I had to change channel and watch something else.  I never saw the film all the way through till I tracked down a DVD copy some twenty years ago.

This movie still frightens the life out of me, even now.  There’s something about the isolated homes and strange, dark woods that still chills me to this day.

The final sequence of the creature menacing a local family in their remote house at night, is one of the most frightening things I’ve ever seen.

Of course, other viewers haven’t been so impressed.  Mrs Platinum Al considers this movie a load of old nonsense and not scary in the slightest.  Maybe I’m just reminded of being a terrified child when I watch The Legend of Boggy Creek now.

Whatever the cause, I know that this mysterious monster tale still has the power to absolutely chill me to the bone.  I wouldn’t watch it on my own at night, ever.  Not for any money.  Check out The Legend of Boggy Creek for yourself.  You’ll probably think it’s a hilariously cheap B-movie with no scares, too.

Or you might witness one of the most awesomely eerie, cult cinematic terrors ever.

10/10 for me

1/10 for Mrs Platinum Al

The Curse of Halloween Horror Fest 2019

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The Curse of the Werewolf (1961)

Hammer’s only venture into lycanthrope-based horror in the movies, The Curse of the Werewolf is a great example of the studio doing what they do best.  There’s no Pete or Chris, but we do get an early chance for Oliver Reed to demonstrate his talent.

Apparently the movie was based on a book called “The Werewolf of Paris”; the location shifted to Spain when a planned film about the Spanish Inquisition had to be abandoned – and the Spanish sets were forced onto this production.

Reed plays Leon, who the audience learns has had a troubled upbringing.  Born on Christmas Day and conceived from a rape, Leon is cursed to become a werewolf.  With love and comfort, his curse is kept under control.  He falls for his employers daughter, who is engaged to another man – and soon Leon’s hidden wolf is out of control.

The Curse of the Werewolf is something of a gem in Hammer’s crown.  The story has tension and drama courtesy of Director, Terence Fisher – and the special effects are adequate for the time.  Reed is engaging as Leon, inviting our sympathy though the audience realises he is doomed.

The result is a monster movie that’s both entertaining and moving, with a depth not often witnessed in a Hammer horror.

8/10

Misery (1990)

You can’t beat a bit of Stephen King, and Misery is one of his best – the book is great, the film is a masterful adaptation.

Paul Sheldon (James Caan) is a best selling novelist, who crashes his car on a snowy Colorado road.  He’s rescued and nursed by Annie Wilkes (Kathy Bates), who claims to be Paul’s number one fan.  But Wilkes discovers that Sheldon has killed off her beloved character, Misery, and his experience goes downhill faster than his car did.

Trapped in Annie’s house and confined to a wheelchair, how will Paul escape before Annie’s descent into murderous madness is complete?

Directed by Rob Reiner, Misery has tension and pace enough to keep anyone on the edge of their seat.  Caan is excellent; Bates is on Oscar winning form as the disturbed woman switching from kindly to evil in a heartbeat.

There’s nothing supernatural in Misery, but this story is certainly horrific.

9/10

A Symphony of Halloween Horror Fest

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King Kong (1933)

Halloween is, for me, all about monster movies.  You can keep the gore-fests, jumpy scares and cheep thrills – monsters are where it’s at.  And you don’t get a better creature feature than King Kong.

Released way back in 1933, this monochrome marvel is still pure excellence.

Daring filmmaker Carl Denham (Robert Armstrong) leads a crew to a long lost island in the middle of nowhere.  There, leading lady Ann Darrow (the legendary Fay Wray) is kidnapped by locals as an offering to their god, Kong.  Kong turns out to be a giant ape, who goes gooey-eyed for the blonde bombshell and fights off numerous prehistoric rivals to keep her safe.

The crew attempt a rescue, but only Jack Driscoll (Bruce Cabot) survives to rescue his sweetheart from her captor.  Denham decides that Kong should be central to his new venture; hatching a plan to capture the ape and take him back to civilisation as his star attraction.

It’s incredible that this film isn’t far off being a century old.  King Kong has a fantastic story and superb special effects that still hold up to this day.  It’s full on entertainment – and one of my favourite films of all time.

But is King Kong horror?  Well, Kong features in my old Horror Top Trumps set – so that qualifies as a definite YES.

10/10

Nosferatu (1922)

More black and white thrills next, with another magnificent movie that really should not be missed.  F W Murnau’s Nosferatu is a chilling piece of early horror cinema, even after all these years.

The film follows the plot of the book Dracula, with a few alterations to (unsuccessfully) avoid claims of plagiarism.  Our hero, Jonathan Harker (or whatever name is used in whichever version you see) is sent to deal with some real estate for the mysterious Count Orlok.  The Count, however, is a vampire – who traps the hero in his castle and makes his way back to Harker’s home town, bringing death with him.

In 1922, the art and language of cinema was still being developed, leading to some strange visuals this movie – such as a ghostly horse and carriage speeding along in a bizarre manner.  Yet the final film is filled with startling, shadowy imagery that maintains a sense of unease, thanks to some genuinely innovative work.

Murnau manages to create some masterful moments of suspense, and Max Schreck as Orlok – whether rising from his grave, or shadow rising eerily up the staircase (a true iconic moment) – is spellbinding.

An early classic of cinema, Nosferatu helped develop cinematic vampire folklore – and still delivers a sense of dread with its uncanny visuals.

10/10

John Carpenter’s Halloween Horror Fest

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They Live (1988)

“I have come here to chew bubble gum and kick ass – and I’m all out of bubble gum!”

Yes, this legendary quote from Wrestling legend Rowdy Roddy Piper can be heard in They Live, another masterpiece from John Carpenter.  It’s a film I resisted watching for many years, as I labelled it just another dumb 80’s macho-man action flick.  Yet there is so much more to this film than that.

Piper plays an out of work drifter, scrabbling for employment and finding a home in a run-down shanty town.  The discovery of a special pair of sunglasses reveals to him that the world is under the control of grim looking aliens, who are using subliminal messaging to subdue the human race to their nefarious will.  So Roddy joins the underground and begins to fight back against the evil alien masters…

It might be more action/sci-fi than straight out horror, but there’s plenty in They Live to qualify it for Halloween Horror Fest.  The bad guys are pretty gruesome, and so is the nature of their plans for the human race.

But it’s the clever social commentary that makes this movie so great, and worth repeated viewings.  The evils of consumerism are revealed as methods to control the people.  Carpenter is attacking unrestrained capitalism, and the ways that media and society combine to keep us all oblivious to exploitation.

Only mildly successful on release, They Live has become a cult film and infiltrated popular culture.  Unsurprising, as the truths it exposes are still sadly prevalent today.  And that’s the scariest thing of all.

CONSUME.  CONFORM.  SUBMIT.  BUY.  NO IMAGINATION.  STAY ASLEEP.  OBEY.

9/10

The Incredible Halloween Horror Fest

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Cujo (1983)

I’ve not read all of Stephen King’s books, but I’ve read a handful and enjoyed them all.  A great deal of his books translate into equally great movies.  Some, like Maximum Overdrive, do not (though I thought it was kinda fun, anyway).

In Cujo, a nice old dog gets bitten by a bat and becomes rabid.  He attacks a couple of people and traps bored suburban housewife Dee Wallace and her young son in their broken down car.  The pair are terrorised by Cujo whilst they wait for rescue, or some way to attempt an escape.

Admittedly, I’ve not read Cujo, so don’t have any background on the tale itself.  The film takes a fair old while to get moving, so much so that I was beginning to wish I’d watched the classic Zoltan – Hound of Dracula instead.  This movie was looking to become one of those unfortunate King stories that become mediocre movies.

Things start to rev up when Cujo starts maiming people, though it’s a long wait.  Yet when Wallace and her boy are trapped in their car, the tension mounts considerably.  Their fear and desperation are vivid, ensuring the slow burn is worth persevering with.

I’m sure the book would be a much more satisfying experience – King is so good at delving into the mind and motivations of his small town characters, that the detail always becomes riveting.  I didn’t find the movie as engrossing as others, but the final act of the film – with Wallace becoming more and more terrified – takes Cujo out of the “dud” category and into the “not bad at all”.

7/10

Halloween Horror Fest 2019

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A lonely forest at night.  The full moon peaks through the gnarled branches, as the wind whistles a mournful lament.  In the distance, a wolf howls… and the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end, involuntarily.

It’s October, and that means it’s time for – Halloween Horror Fest!

For the last few years, I’ve spent the month of October watching a load of scary movies.  Some spooky; some creepy; some funny – and some shit-your-shoes-off horrifying.

And then I write a little review.  Like this…

The Frighteners (1996)

Okay – so The Frighteners isn’t a full-on horror film exactly, but it has plenty of supernatural elements that make it ideal viewing for this time of year.  And anyway, we needed to watch something that wouldn’t scare the little ‘un too much, if she overheard it while trying to get to sleep upstairs!

Michael J Fox stars as Frank Bannister, a one time architect turned dodgy psychic investigator.  Bannister can actually communicate with spirits, but chooses to employ his ghostly buddies to help him exploit customers with phoney exorcisms.

Except townspeople are dying from fatal heart attacks, and Frank suspects that the ghost of a deranged killer is behind it all.  Unable to convince the law that his supernatural powers are genuine, Bannister becomes the chief suspect – and must clear his name and stop the killer.

Directed by Peter Jackson, this film makes a decent attempt at being spooky, funny and entertaining all in one go.  Quality performances from Fox and the cast (including a small role for the great John Astin) – combined with the directors flair and skill – keep the film rolling along enjoyably.

The special effects were state of the art in 1996, and still hold up well today – with several creepy moments realised with CGI that is actually tastefully done.

The Frighteners just manages to steer away from becoming silly, and remains good fun.  Ideal for a Halloween movie that won’t cause nightmares, it’s like Most Haunted with a plot and (more) laughs.

7/10

More macabre movies soon…

Singles Night at the Virtual Hot Tub #12

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The pile of 7″ singles in my music room continues to grow.  They arrive from all manner of sources, in various conditions, and wait patiently for me to spin them.  It’s a never ending task – like that old cliche, painting the Forth Bridge.

But it’s fun – making my way through the collection of random vinyl goodies; having a few drinks and enjoying the music.

I play both sides, A then B, and then move onto the next single in the pile.  All manner of tunes could be heard, from the classic to cheesy nonsense.

Here’s the latest batch:

  1. The Fatback Band – “(Are You Ready) Do the Bus Stop” / “Gotta Learn How to Dance”
  2. Earth, Wind & Fire – “That’s the Way of the World” / “Africano”
  3. Tom Jones – “Letter to Lucille” / “Thank the Lord”
  4. Belinda Carlisle – “Little Black Book” / “Only a Dream”
  5. Betty Boo – “24 Hours” / “24 Hours (Instrumental)”
  6. Jan Hammer – “Miami Vice Theme” / “Miami Vice Theme (TV Version)” / “Miami Vice Theme (12″ Edit)”
  7. Survivor – “Burning Heart” / “Feels Like Love”
  8. The Kinks – “All Day and All of the Night” / “You Really Got Me”
  9. Roxy Music – “All I Want is You” / “Your Application’s Failed”
  10. Owen Paul – “My Favourite Waste of Time” / “Just Another Day”
  11. The Simpsons – “Do the Bartman (7″ House Mix/Edit)” / “Do the Bartman (LP Edit)”
  12. Edelweiss – “Bring Me Edelweiss” / “Kitz-Stein-Horn”
  13. Roy Orbison – “You Got It” / “The Only One”
  14. The Lovin’ Spoonful – “Summer in the City” / “Bald Headed Lena”
  15. Elton John – “Song for Guy” / “Blue Eyes”
  16. Ohio Players – “Fire” / “Together”
  17. Kool & The Gang – “Cherish” / “Celebration”
  18. Diana Ross – “I’m Still Waiting” / “Touch Me in the Morning”
  19. The Real Thing – “You to Me Are Everything” / “Keep An Eye (On Your Best Friend)”
  20. David Soul – “Don’t Give Up On Us” / “Black Bean Soup”
  21. Kelly Marie – “Feels Like I’m in Love” / “Shattered Glass”
  22. Dusty Springfield – “I Just Don’t Know What to do with Myself” / “My Colouring Book”

I really enjoyed that Singles Night session.  There were a fair few out standing funky numbers, as well as songs by my favourite pop babes ever, Belinda and Betty.  Lovely.

Plus – how great is that Kinks single?  An all time classic couple of tracks – and a great record for my collection.  Along with a few other legendary rock tunes, this was a great evening of music.

Fabulous Fish Dogs

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Tell me: do you like hot dogs?  Do you like fish finger butties?  If you do, then get ready for the taste sensation that’s sweeping the nation…

FISH DOGS

I want to share this amazing new culinary marvel with my valued readers of the Virtual Hot Tub here and now, so you don’t miss out.

All you need is a packet of frozen fish fingers – and an appropriate number of bread finger rolls.  Simply cook up your fish fingers as normal, and serve within the bread roll.

Garnish the fish dog with whatever sauce you prefer.  Try mayonnaise, salad cream, tartare sauce – even tomato ketchup if you’re a bit freaky.  Let your imagination run riot and add whatever you like.

You can dish up with fries (curly recommended), or whatever else gets your taste buds bursting with anticipation.

There’s no point me writing out a detailed list of ingredients or preparation instructions, the FISH DOG really is very simple.  You’re basically replacing the sausage in a hot dog with a fish finger.  That’s it.  Simple – but oh, so clever.

Once you try this spectacular creation, you’re sure to be entranced by its immense taste.  You’ll wonder why you’ve never tried FISH DOGS before.  You’ll wonder why it’s taken so long for this obvious, yet deliciously original meal to come to your attention.

Don’t delay – treat yourself and your family to FISH DOGS today!

Helligators – Hell III Album Review

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Helligators – Hell III

Sliptrick Records/Grand Sounds Promotion

Release date: 04/06/2019

Running Time: 1 hour

Review by: Alun Jones

8.5/10

 

Listening to Hell III – the new Helligators release – and you can almost smell the Cajun cookin’ and moonshine brewing.  This is greasy, crazy biker rock from the southern states.  No doubt Helligators have fine-tuned their art in a roadhouse shack just off some dusty highway, the sounds of the bayou just inches away.  The heat and the trees, the swamp and the…

What?  They’re from where?  Like Rome, Florida or something?  What, actual Rome?  In Italy?  Oh.  Well ya could’a fooled me!

Yes, Helligators are from Rome, Italy – though my first listen to this album had me thinking of something far more Corrosion of Conformity in origin.  Hell III is powerful, dirty hard rock with just a hint of a stoner metal, big melodies and southern charm.  But not southern USA charm, apparently…

Anyway, this third album from the band blows the doors off with the huge, raucous rampage of “Rebellion” – a great start to the album.  It reeks of attitude and speeds out of the gates in a Motorhead fashion.

Following tracks “Here to Stay” and “Bleeding” apply the brakes slightly, but are just as crushingly relentless.  This is big chunky guitar territory, guitars courtesy of Kamo and El Santo are head bangingly infectious and also intricate when called for.

There’s a definite change of pace with the almost bluesy “Where I Belong” – but by Jupiter, the chorus is monstrous. The skilled vocals of Simone “Dude” have a versatility that keep everything together and has class enough to avoid a parmesan power ballad stench.

Helligators are certainly stretching their creativity with this album.  “The Prison (Confession Pt 1)” and “Gone (Confession Pt 2)” demonstrate an ability to develop an epic suite of music.  Meanwhile, the instrumental “Bassthard Session” also shows the rhythm section – Alex (drums) and Pinna (Bass) to full effect.

But it’s the fast, super charged rock’n’roll of total bangers like “Born Again” and “Pedal to the Metal” that are the great prize here.  Hard rock that’s loud and fun – Helligators came, saw and conquered all.

Did I tell you about the time I was in Italy with Ozzy, on tour in 81?  I took him and the band to a restaurant after the gig for some quality Italian grub.  Ozzy was off his tits and thought the spaghetti was worms, and tried to snort them.  It ended with food everywhere and Ozzy pissing up the walls.  I had a right job apologising to the manager and sorting everything out.  Ozzy – lovely bloke; absolute liability.

Helligators website is here.

Helligators YouTube site is here.

Visit Helligators on the Sliptrick Records site here.

This review originally on the Ever Metal website – don’t forget to pay them a visit!

New Deck 2019 – Death Skateboards Richie Jackson

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A few weeks back, I got a new deck and (eventually) set it up to ride.  I took some photos to commemorate the beautiful graphic and general awesomeness of the full, set up skateboard.  Here it is, for our mutual enjoyment.

Again, I opted for a Death deck – and again a Richie Jackson model.  Great company, inspirational skater.  This is an 8.25″ wide model.

According to the graphic, it’s a Richie Jackson “Collectors Shred Sled” – but this particular baby ain’t going on the wall.  Oh no, it’s for shredding, not collecting.

The deck was ordered from Native Skate Store.  The merchandise arrived with no problem at all, everything was perfect.

I also ordered a set of 53mm Death wheels from Native.  Together with a new set of ABEC 5 bearings, and my previous set of Independent trucks, I was able to piece together the work of art you see here.

It’s a great set up and I’ve really enjoyed riding it so far.  No complaints whatsoever.  The deck width is perfect for me for me these days, so I’ll stick with that for now.  The wheels are rolling well too, I’d forgotten how nice a feeling it is to ride a new set.

These photos were taken a few weeks ago, and this skateboard doesn’t look as fresh as it used to.  There are quite a few scrapes from concrete and the number of those marks is growing.  But hey, that’s the way it goes.  It’s great to skate and that’s all that matters.

Still, it’s nice to be reminded of that brand new, virgin set up in these photos.  There’s just something incredibly rad about getting – and skating – a new skateboard.  I never get tired of it.

The Death skateboards website is here.

Check out Native Skate Store here.

And don’t forget to check out Richie Jackson on social media!