Endoscopy Playlist

Last year was a nightmare. The worst part for me, beyond the pandemic, was my Farmer Giles playing up. I was in absolute agony, for months. The previously pleasant experience of seeing a friend to the coast became torture.

Over the years I’ve had several tattoos; fallen off a ramp whilst skateboarding and landed forehead first; fallen through a neighbours loft, shredding my foot in the process – plus many more ridiculous episodes of pain. None of them have ever hurt like the Emma Freuds giving you trouble, I can tell you. God bless all the mothers out there, because I have no doubt child birth is worse than a cat-arse-trophy like mine and I respect you all the more for going through with it.

After several weeks and months of treatment and examination by wonderful NHS staff, my ailment had been diagnosed as an anal fissure and I was mostly cured. I still pray every night that I have beaten this terrible affliction.

Part of the healing process was a visit to hospital for an endoscopy examination, i.e: a camera up the bum. The problem was determined, and thus, this was purely a precautionary measure.

My examination was held at the Nuffield hospital in Chester, who were helping the local NHS heroes in a dire time. I was somewhat apprehensive, but was very well looked after by the nurses and doctors there. I had fasted for hours. Then, I had to wait in a rather grand, clean white room, wearing my surgical gown.

Whilst waiting for the exam, I was entertained by music playing around the hospital ward. It was a mixture of classic pop, rock and disco, mostly from the Seventies, and I enjoyed every second. Tapping my fingers and singing along, I was relaxed and optimistic for the procedure. I was so happy, I made a mental note of as many songs as I could remember and created this playlist.

Here is the playlist, which I recommend to lighten your spirits in adverse moments!

  • ABBA – “Take a Chance on Me”
  • Rainbow – “Since You’ve Been Gone”
  • Toto – “Hold the Line”
  • Blondie – “One Way or Another”
  • Buggles – “Video Killed the Radio Star”
  • Rod Stewart – “Do Ya Think I’m Sexy”
  • Yvonne Elliman – “If I Can’t Have You”
  • Bee Gees – “Jive Talkin'”
  • Stevie Wonder – “Superstition”
  • Wild Cherry – “Play That Funky Music”
  • Boston – “More Than a Feeling”
  • Kiss – “I Was Made for Loving You”
  • T-Rex – “Get It On”
  • The O’Jays – “Love Train”
  • Hues Corporation – “Rock the Boat”
  • Genesis – “Follow You, Follow Me”
  • Boney M – “Daddy Cool”
  • The Nolans – “I’m in the Mood for Dancing”

Those are all the songs I could remember (the gas they gave me may have blurred some of my memory). But what a great selection of songs! I’ll bet anyone would feel ecstatic with tunes like those to cheer you up.

One thing that made me laugh, was waiting for the doctor to visit me with a camera to go up the nether eye whilst “Do Ya Think I’m Sexy” was blaring out. That song was so inappropriate I couldn’t help but chortle.

This blog was brought to you in association with the Viz Profanisaurus, a modern work of literary genius.

Singles Night at the Virtual Hot Tub #21

I promised you lucky readers more Singles Night fun soon – and here you go. Another twenty 7″ vinyl singles, played one after the other, to create this sensational playlist.

Pour yourself a drink and join me, as we delve into the deep recesses of my thus far unplayed record collection for a night of rock’n’roll mayhem. Prepare to have your socks well and truly rocked…

  1. Chris Cornell – “Patience” / “Nothing Compares ” U”
  2. Sweet Apple – “I’ve Got a Feeling (That Won’t Change)” / “Dead Moon (Demo Version)”
  3. ABBA – “The Winner Takes It All” / “Elaine”
  4. The Knack – “My Sharona” / “Let Me Out”
  5. Free – “Wishing Well” / “Let Me Show You”
  6. Thin Lizzy – “The Boys Are Back in Town” / “Emerald”
  7. Cheap Trick – “I Want You to Want Me” / “Clock Strikes Ten”
  8. The Who – “5.15” / “Water”
  9. Bachman Turner Overdrive – “You Ain’t Seen Nothing Yet” / “Free Wheelin'”
  10. The Beach Boys – “Break Away” / “Celebrate the News”
  11. Stakker – “Humanoid” / “Humanoid (Part 2)”
  12. Flying Lizards – “Money” / “TV”
  13. Faith No More – “Anne’s Song” / “Greed”
  14. Hi Tek 3 ft. Ya Kid K – “Spin That Wheel (Turtles Get Real) 7″ Pizza Mix” / “7” Pizza Dub Mix”
  15. Phil Collins – “In the Air Tonight” / “The Roof is Leaking”
  16. Forrest – “Rock the Boat” / “Loving You”
  17. Stan Ridgway – “Camouflage” / “Rio Greyhound”
  18. Ella Fitzgerald – “Desafinado” / “Stardust (Bossa Nova)”
  19. Creedence Clearwater Revival – “Green River” / “Commotion”
  20. Python Lee Jackson – “In a Broken Dream” / “Boogie Woogie Joe”

Boom! What a great collection. My favourite Who song, Thin Lizzy’s best (?), BTO and Free. That Knack song is, of course, a classic – as is the Cheap Trick track. All were from a record fair (remember those?) if I recall correctly.

That Faith No More song is their very worst, by an otherwise spectacular band. I’m no Phil Collins fan really, but that track is pretty good, admit it. Throw in Flying Lizards and The Beach Boys and you’ve got a helluva playlist. And if you don’t love “Camouflage” there must be something wrong with you.

The Chris Cornell was a Record Store Day special which I picked up from VOD records in Mold. Great shop who also organised the record fair I mentioned above. Check them out here.

Till next time – keep rockin’!

Singles Night at the Virtual Hot Tub #20

Here we go with the first Singles Night of 2021! The Virtual Hot Tub is ecstatic with anticipation for the return of these playlists.

What’s it all about? Well, I’m glad you asked. The singles in question are 45rpm vinyl singles, which I have accumulated over time from various sources. The plan: listen to the records, side A then side B, one after the other without skipping any in the pile. Whilst drinking booze.

Let’s see how I got on this time…

  1. The Temptations – “Psychedelic Shack” / “That’s the Way Love Is”
  2. Queen – “Killer Queen” / “Flick of the Wrist”
  3. Buzzcocks – “I Don’t Mind” / “Autonomy”
  4. The Clash – “Bankrobber” / “Rockers Galore… UK Tour”
  5. The Clash – “Complete Control” / “City of the Dead”
  6. The Damned – “History of the World Part 1” / “I Believe the Impossible” / “Sugar & Spite”
  7. Skids – “Sweet Suburbia” / “Open Sound”
  8. The Beach Boys – “Mona” / “Rock and Roll Music” / “Sail on Sailor” / “Marcella”
  9. ABBA – “Head Over Heels” / “The Visitors”
  10. Bananarama – “Cheers Then” / “Girl About Town”
  11. The Belle Stars – “Sign of the Times” / “Madness”
  12. Chicory Tip – “Son of My Father” / “Pride Comes Before a Fall”
  13. John Farnham – “You’re the Voice” / “Going, Going, Gone”
  14. Stevie Wonder – “My Cherie Amour” / “Don’t Know Why I Love You”
  15. Bardo – “One Step Further” / “Lady of the Night”
  16. The Motors – “Love and Loneliness” / “Time for Make-Up”
  17. Hot Chocolate – “So You Win Again” / “A Part of Being with You”
  18. Elton John – “Goodbye Yellow Brick Road” / “Screw You”
  19. Blondie – “The Tide is High” / “Susie and Jeffrey”
  20. Slade – “We’ll Bring the House Down” / “Hold on to Your Hats”

Twenty – count ’em – twenty great tracks. Well, mostly. A solid offering from the world of punk rock in that collection, with the Buzzcocks, Clash, Damned and Skids singles all being salvaged from a local charity shop. Lucky day.

I had a great night spinning these discs, there are some really awesome records to add to the collection there. Time for more soon. Stay tuned!

Singles Night at the Virtual Hot Tub #19

Hit singles! All time classic songs! Novelty throw-away rubbish! From the cool to the crap, it’s all to be found at Platinum Al’s Virtual Hot Tub on a Singles Night.

You see, what I do is, listen to a pile of old 7 inch singles that have been languishing in my “not played yet” pile. They could have come from anywhere: genuine gems that I’ve tracked down; record fair lucky finds; or – more likely – junk I find in charity shops.

Pour yourself a drink and check this list out. Do you own any of these on vinyl? What are your favourites? What should be consigned to a fiery pit and melted down?

  1. Kim Wilde – “You Came” / “Stone”
  2. Louis Armstrong – “All the Time in the World” / “Pretty Little MIssy”
  3. The Hollies – “The Air That I Breathe” / “No More Riders”
  4. Duran Duran – “The Wild Boys” / “(I’m Looking for) Cracks in the Pavement (1984)”
  5. Bananarama – “Robert De Niro’s Waiting” / “Push!”
  6. The Beach Boys – “Good Vibrations” / “Heroes and Villains”
  7. Justin Hayward – “Forever Autumn” / “The Fighting Machine”
  8. The Buggles – “Video Killed the Radio Star” / “Kid Dynamo”
  9. ABBA – “Angeleyes” / “Voulez-Vous”
  10. The Creatures – “Miss the Girl” / “Hot Springs in the Snow”
  11. Blondie – “Rapture” / “Walk Like Me”
  12. Bobby Patrick Band – “Dallas Theme” / “The Waltons Theme”
  13. The Beatles – “The Ballad of John and Yoko” / “Old Brown Shoe”
  14. Goombay Dance Band – “Seven Tears” / “Mama Coco”
  15. Lionel Richie – “All Night Long (All Night)” / “Wandering Stranger”
  16. Donna Summer – “Dim All the Lights” / “There Will Always Be a You”
  17. Jermaine Stewart – “We Don’t Have to…” / “Brilliance”
  18. Allan Sherman – “Mexican Hat Dance” / “Won’t You Come Home Disraeli?”
  19. Earth, Wind and Fire – “Let’s Groove” / “Let’s Groove (Instrumental)”
  20. Pointer Sisters – “I’m so Excited” / “What a Surprise”

Some classics indeed. Another great night of a couple of small drinkies and spinning wax: I recommend it to anyone.

Singles Night at the Virtual Hot Tub #9

Come in, number 9!  Yes, it’s another night of spinning 45s and boozing – a ritual I like to call Singles Night.  Because I play 7″ singles, obviously.  There’s an ever growing stack of 45 rpm singles and I need to deal with them.  This is the latest session.

Starting off with Elvis, as is now tradition, what other wonders will we hear?

  1. Elvis Presley – “Always On My Mind” / “Separate Ways”
  2. Siouxsie & The Banshees – “Happy House” / “Drop Dead” / “Celebration”
  3. Albert King – “The Very Thought of You” / “I Get Evil”
  4. Queen – “Los Palabras De Amor (The Words of Love” / “Cool Cat”
  5. ABBA – “The Winner Takes It All” / “Elaine”
  6. Gerry Rafferty – “Baker Street” / “Big Change in the Weather”
  7. Bryan Ferry – “The Price of Love” / “Shame, Shame, Shame” / “Heart On My Sleeve” / “Its Only Love”
  8. The Steve Miller Band – “Abracadabra” / “Never Say No”
  9. The Rolling Stones – “The Last Time” / “Play with Fire”
  10. Kenny Rogers & The First Edition – “Ruby, Don’t Take Your Love to Town” / “Girl Get Ahold of Yourself”
  11. Donovan & Jeff Beck Group – “Barabajagal” / “Trudi”
  12. The Kyriakos – “More Greek Themes: Syneeta Platia” / “Mia Fora Monaha Ftani” / “Moraxia” / “Iliachtida”
  13. Boney M – “Rasputin” / “Never Change Lovers in the Middle of the Night”
  14. Herb Alpert & Tijuana Brass – “The Lonely Bull” / “Acapulco 1922”
  15. Yardbirds – “For Your Love” / “Got to Hurry”
  16. Billie Jo Spears – “Blanket on the Ground” / “Come on Home”
  17. Tony Bennett – “(I Left My Heart) In San Francisco” / “Candy Kisses”
  18. Geordie – “She’s a Teaser” / “We’re Alright Now”
  19. Neil – “Hole in My Shoe” / “Hurdy Gurdy Mushroom Man”
  20. Talk Talk – “Life’s What You Make It” / “Life’s What You Make It (Live)”
  21. The Art of Noise featuring Duane Eddy – “Peter Gunn” / “Something Always Happens”
  22. The B-52’s – “Roam” / “Whammy Kiss (Live)” / “Dance This Mess Around (Live)”
  23. Bobby Vinton – “Blue Velvet” / “Blue on Blue”

Wow, another eclectic bunch of tracks there!  Points of particular interest include Geordie, who feature (of course) the legendary Brian Johnson in his pre-AC/DC days.  And yes, that is Neil, alias Nigel Planer, from the Young Ones.

Several genres covered there and a fine evening’s listen.  More soon!

Singles Night at the Virtual Hot Tub #8

OK, so Singles Night at the Virtual Hot Tub is not a dating service.  What it is, is me spending an evening playing through my ever growing stack of 45 rpm vinyl singles and having a drink or three.

Here’s the latest batch of 7 inch goodness:

  1. Elvis Presley – “You Don’t Have to Say You Love Me” / “Patch It Up”
  2. Siouxsie & The Banshees – “Song From the Edge of the World” / “The Whole Price of Blood”
  3. The Rolling Stones – “Undercover of the Night” / “All the Way Down”
  4. Queen – “Headlong” / “All God’s People”
  5. Ozzy Osbourne – “Shot in the Dark” / “Rock’n’Roll Rebel”
  6. The KLF – “What Time is Love? (Live at Transcentral)” / “What Time is Love? (Techno Gate Mix)”
  7. Linda Lusardi – “Eye Contact” / “Eye Contact (Club Mix)”
  8. Philip Bailey – “Easy Lover (with Phil Collins)” / “Woman”
  9. Albert King – “Born Under a Bad Sign” / “I Got the Blues”
  10. Isaac Hayes – “Do Your Thing” / “Ellie’s Love Theme (Instrumental)”
  11. Billy Idol – “Rebel Yell” / “(Do Not) Stand in the Shadows”
  12. Kim Wilde – “Love Blonde” / “Can You Hear It”
  13. Aerosmith – “Love in an Elevator” / “Young Lust”
  14. Talking Heads – “And She Was” / “Perfect World”
  15. Shakin’ Stevens – “Because I Love You” / “Tell Me One More Time”
  16. Samantha Fox – “Do Ya Do Ya (Wanna Please Me)” / “Never Gonna Fall in Love Again”
  17. Can – “I Want More” / “More”
  18. ABBA – “Knowing Me, Knowing You” / “Happy Hawaii”
  19. KC & The Sunshine Band – “That’s the Way (I Like It)” / “Queen of Clubs”
  20. Madonna – “Into the Groove” / “Shoo-Bee-Doo”
  21. Dean Martin – “Return to Me” / “Forgetting You”
  22. Roxy Music – “Pyjamarama” / “The Pride and the Pain”
  23. Steve Winwood – “Valerie” / “Talking Back to the Night (Instrumental Version)”
  24. Glen Campbell – “Why Don’t We Just Sleep on it Tonight (with Tanya Tucker)” / A Daisy a Day”

The selection above was, as always, determined by whatever was next on the pile.  There’s no choosing songs involved, it’s just playing the records in order.

But what a great selection that was!  Not one, but two 1980’s Page 3 legends; plus a load of tunes from classic rock to pop, country and soul.

By the way: What’s Madonna and a piece of toilet paper got in common?

They both get into the groove!  HAHA!

I had a great time spinning these tunes, more soon.

Singles Night at the Virtual Hot Tub #6

Welcome to another Singles Night at the Virtual Hot Tub with your host, Platinum Al!

As previous, I spent the evening listening to a stack of 45 rpm singles that I’d acquired over time from several sources.  Whilst imbibing some fine alcohol.  The following is a list of those singles, A and B sides listened to in order.

There are some particularly sweet slabs of vinyl in this edition.  As always, however, we’re never too far away from some rank cheese…

  1. INXS – “The Gift” / “The Gift (Extended Mix)”
  2. Sweet – “Action” / “Sweet F.A.”
  3. Rod Stewart – “Reason to Believe” / “Maggie May”
  4. The KLF – “America: What Time is Love?” / “America No More”
  5. ABBA – “Mamma Mia” / “Tropical Loveland”
  6. Elvis Presley – “Trouble” / “Young Dreams” / “Crawfish” / “Dixieland Rock”
  7. Cream – “Strange Brew” / “Tales of Brave Ulysses”
  8. Right Said Fred – “I’m Too Sexy” / “I’m Too Sexy (Instrumental)”
  9. Anthrax – “Indians” / “Sabbath Bloody Sabbath” / “Taint”
  10. The Stranglers – “All Day and All of the Night” / “Viva Vlad!”
  11. W.A.S.P. – “I Don’t Need No Doctor” / “Widowmaker”
  12. Beastie Boys – “(You Gotta) Fight For Your Right (To Party)” / “Time to Get Ill”
  13. Iron Maiden – “The Clairvoyant” / “The Prisoner”
  14. AC/DC – “Let’s Get It Up” / “Back in Black”
  15. Yes – “Into the Lens” / “Does It Really Happen?”
  16. Marillion – “Incommunicado” / “Going Under”
  17. Kim Wilde – “Cambodia” / Watching for Shapes”
  18. The Beatles – “Day Tripper” / “We Can Work It Out”
  19. The Spencer Davis Group – “Keep On Running” / “Somebody Help Me” / “Every Little Bit Hurts” / “I’m a Man” / “Gimme Some Lovin'”
  20. Booker T and the M.G.s – “Time is Tight” / “Hang ‘Em High”
  21. The Byrds – “Mr Tambourine Man” / “I Knew I’d Want You”
  22. The Skids – “Circus Games” / “Onedecree”
  23. Manuel & The Music of the Mountains – “The Portugese Washer Women” / “Never on Sunday”

Note: the B-side of the Anthrax single is actually their track “Imitation of Life”. 

I’m mighty proud of that selection.  Not that I had anything to do with it, the choice was random – I just took whatever disc was top of the pile and made my way through.

But what a bunch of scorchers!  One of my favourite Beatles tracks; Cream; Booker T; some classic metal and the Beastie Boys.  It doesn’t get better than that.

Or rather, it won’t.  Most of the rest of the pile of 7″ singles isn’t up to that quality…

Singles Night at the Virtual Hot Tub #5

It’s been a while, but time to work through that stack of 7″ singles again.  I had a few beers and listened to the tunes in my collection – good and bad – in order, both sides.

There have been a few stinkers in previous editions.  This week, however, the good outweighed the cheesy for once.  Just about.

Here we go:

  1. Jimmy Barnes & INXS – “Good Times” / “Love is Enough”
  2. Tubeway Army – “Are ‘Friends’ Electric?” / “We Are So Fragile?”
  3. Black Sabbath – “Paranoid” / “Snow Blind”
  4. Rod Stewart – “Sailing” / “Stone Cold Sober”
  5. The KLF – “Justified and Ancient: Stand by the Jams” / “Justified and Ancient: The White Room Version”
  6. Bobby Gentry – “Ode to Billy Joe” / “Mississippi Delta”
  7. Sweet – “Fox on the Run” / Miss Demeanor”
  8. Generation X – “Ready Steady Go” / “No No No”
  9. Atomic Rooster – “Devil’s Answer” / “Tomorrow Night”
  10. Blondie – “Call Me” / “Call Me (Instrumental)”
  11. The Incredible Bongo Band – “Bongo Rock” / “Bongolia”
  12. All About Eve – “What Kind of Fool” / “Gold and Silver”
  13. Level 42 – “Something About You” / “Coup D’Etat (Version)”
  14. Dave Brubeck Quartet – “Me and My Shadow” / “At a Perfume Counter” / “Frenesi” / “Mamselle”
  15. Herb Alpert & the Tijuana Brass – “Casino Royale” / “The Wall Street Rag”
  16. ABBA – “Does Your Mother Know” / “Kisses of Fire”
  17. Hank Williams – “Honky Tonkin'”/ “Howlin’ at the Moon” / “I Ain’t Got Nothin’ But Time” / “You’d Better Keep it on Your Mind”
  18. The Rolling Stones – “19th Nervous Breakdown” / “As Tears Go By”

Horrible Histories Playlist

My daughter Eloise had her 8th birthday last weekend.  At the moment, she’s a big fan of the BBC children’s TV series, Horrible Histories, and requested a party based on that theme.

If you’re not familiar with Horrible Histories, let me tell you it’s well worth checking it.  Both funny and informative, the show makes history appeal to kids (and adults) by illuminating some unusual – and sometimes gross – facts from various periods throughout the past.

We’ve all become big fans in our house, actually.  So the party was going to be fun – everyone could dress up as historical characters and entertainment geared to the theme.

Only one thing remained – some music suitable for days gone by.  Not having much music in my collection that was actually from previous ages, I had to dig out some tunes that could fit the bill.  Here’s what I came up with…

  1. Hanna-Barbera – “(Meet) The Flintstones [Main Title]”
  2. The Bangles – “Walk Like an Egyptian”
  3. Mikis Theodorakis – “Zorbas”
  4. Iron Maiden – “Alexander the Great”
  5. ABBA – “Waterloo”
  6. Chuck Berry – “Roll Over Beethoven”
  7. Boney M. – “Rasputin”
  8. Clutch – “Abraham Lincoln”
  9. Trio Guadalajara – “La Bamba”
  10. De Danaan – “The Cameronian Reel/The Doon Reel”
  11. Iron Maiden – “Ghengis Khan”
  12. Mariachi Mexico de Pepe Villa – “El Jarbe Tapatio (Mexican Hat Dance)”
  13. Jonathan Richman & the Modern Lovers – “Egyptian Reggae”
  14. Madness – “Night Boat to Cairo” 
  15. Sweet – “Alexander Graham Bell”
  16. Rodrigo Y Gabriela – “Vikingman”
  17. Iron Maiden – “Invaders”
  18. The Kinks – “Victoria”
  19. Boney M. – “Ma Baker”
  20. Sweet – “Wig Wam Bam”
  21. Mikis Theodorakis – “Varka Sto Gialo”
  22. Bananarama – “Venus”
  23. Tom Jones – “Delilah”
  24. The Beatles – “Roll Over Beethoven”
  25. Christina Aguilera – “Candyman”
  26. The City of Prague Philharmonic Orchestra – “The Raiders March”
  27. Eric Rogers – “Carry On Cleo”
  28. Eric Rogers – “Carry On Up the Khyber”

Ok, so some of those tracks are less scraping the barrell and more like digging the dust on an archaeological dig, but it did the job.  Basically, without Iron Maiden I’d have been screwed…

Songs of the Week 04.09.2016

How’ve you been?  Well I hope.  Here are five more songs heard in the last seven days that I particularly enjoyed.

  1. The Stooges – 1970
  2. The Who – The Seeker
  3. Mudhoney – Sweet Young Thing Ain’t Sweet No More
  4. ABBA – Money, Money, Money
  5. Metallica – Orion

I love ABBA, but that song earned it’s place in this weeks top 5 after my daughter sang it all week.  Good choice!